Soumaiya Khan

Mumbai locals, a life within a life!

I’ve travelled to a lot of countries and have often used their public transport. However there is nothing like the Mumbai locals. There is a connection that is made here beyond words. Faces that become a part of your daily life.

It’s love and hate relationship with the local, one day you love a face, that helps you find a seat or gives you their own. And the next day you are displeased at their no acknowledgement.

A lot has happened in my life during in these few months. The local had become an inherent part of our life. I travelled with my three year old son by the 10:12 Ladies special from Mira-Road to Churchgate. I used to board this train to take my son to school.
It was definitely a challenge. It was a battle that I was fighting not only in my personal life but even in my commute.

Obviously it was hard carrying a toddler, as early as ten o'clock in the morning. The toddler was cranky and would want to be carried. And with my back ache, climbing multiple bridges and holding him throughout the journey was extremely tiresome.

A few women started watching me everyday, and since it was the crucial office hour everyone as in a hurry to get on with their day. In the first class, (the middle F.C.) I was asked why was I carrying my child and where would we go everyday. Initially I tried to ignore these questions, but I couldn’t hide the sadness on my face and the school bag to go with it.

The questions stopped at once, and in that one day we made some friends. Some smiled, some didn’t, some expressed their kindness and some showed their indifferent attitude. However I had to continue the commute.

It would upset me when young girls couldn’t squeeze in a small child, pregnant woman or an oldie. I am one person who would never sit but with a child in your arms standing for 40 minutes does get tiring.

Sheryl, was a middle aged aunty. She was the first one to become friends with my son and keep him entertained. I can’t explain what a blessing that was, and that my son was actually laughing in spite of all our pain. She told me how life was a test, and though she had a great husband and a life. She couldn’t have kids. She told me to stay strong and it was her kindness that I needed. They were many few others who were around, who never bothered to acknowledge the child and a few that were always offering.

But I saw pregnant women who were pushed. Old women who weren’t respected and children who weren’t cared for. It took a lot of courage to not tell off people because I was dealing with my own baggage. Yet once a while I would put some girls to shame. I felt that was really needed.

You are a woman of today and you talk feminism but do you really feel it?

You don’t smile at the lady passenger who sits next to you. You don’t give up your seat for the woman with a bump. You push the one carrying a child and you don’t reply to the old woman who asks for directions.

May I ask why this rudeness?

You may be having troubles in your life and so do I. Yet I don’t feel right seeing what I saw.
Then how do you feel good doing it?
Frustrations and fatigue can be stories, but is it so hard to be nice to a woman who is pmsing.
She is going through a rough time and I know you can’t take that away.
Is it so difficult to show some decency to a fellow human?

Women are fighting and pulling each other’s hair and clothes. Educated or not, they are ready to bring the other one down. It surprised me when I overheard men saying, that this mostly happens only in the Ladies compartments. And I was saddened because this is not what one woman must do to the other. We raise other women, not decrease them.

I want to urge the Railway ministers to close all the doors when the trains run. Every life is valuable and teaching manners to a population of 80 lakh is beyond possible. Small measures can be taken and those people who hang on the doors and windows can be protected.

I don’t know how many of you will ask for change. Although I really hope you are the ones that make the change. Being soft as a woman won’t bring your spirits down, it will lift up someone else’s life.
Be the hand you can count on...

My love and dua to the ladies on the 10:12 special. I hope you all are in that happy spirits that made my travel memorable forever.

Love and Luck,
SK

In this era where life is faster than a lightning, it’s really hard to meet people who touch your heart at once and make a connection. My inspirational woman is such a personality, whose kind heart and sharp mind makes you want to learn so much from her.

As we sit chatting, she looks over at all her responsibilities and tells me how peaceful life is, when you look at it just the way she does.

It’s hard to believe that she didn’t have a mother while growing up. Yet, She has one of the warmest maternal sides ever. You will be bonded within a few minutes of conversation.

Born in a Punjabi household, Anjali is now Inaaya and she loves being who she is. The positivity she reflects, is what her personality and her page is about. She built Chai Pe Milte Hain in 2015 and it is now a group of 32k+ members. She jokes at how she was banned from another page and she started with her own page. She praises her elder sister-in-law for the push and her husband, who always has her back.

CPMH is literally her second baby and you know it as soon as you are on the page. Inaaya takes care of every small detail and it’s a family that she has built of people who come from different walks of life.

Life wasn’t fun and frolic, yet she worked herself to reach the fame and love she receives today. Relationships never came easy to her, her parents separated when she had barely understood life. Her family hadn’t been the most perfect as she grew up with her father , grandparents and an elder sister, yet she fought like a fighter to make a life that made her proud of what she has today.

She tells me that the vacuum her heart feels is beyond measurable but she tries to fill it with answers that she finds in the Qur’ran.

It's commendable to see how she has taken Islam on her stride as a religion and made such a beautiful revert. Her faith and values are truly inspirational and in an era where a bit of social media fame goes in the head. It is not the case with Inaaya, she is one perfect examples of being down to earth and understands that having her head on her shoulders is not only necessary for her but, for her kids as well. She tells me how she tries to break all the pampering that goes into spoiling her elder son. The fact that she explains her children from young age, the importance of participating than winning. Being well known is easy but, being respectful is a responsibility she carries with pride.
From being the AVP of HSBC bank, to acting. Inaaya has faced so many wars. She honestly says, talks about casting couch and how not much has changed since then. Like many, her dreams of making fame in the industry didn’t happen in the way she must have wanted. But I love her fame now and I respect it even more. She is a woman of substance and kindness and there isn’t anything else that can substitute. Marriage and kids are a responsibility of its own kind and her page that connects large communities is what makes her truly inspirational. And like Inaaya concludes her life in a dua, I conclude and pray for her well being and making CPMH more famous and always a fun loving page.

“Wato Izzo Mantasha Wato Zillo Mantasha”

O God, Lord of the kingdom! You give the kingdom to whomever you please and strip the kingdom from whomever you please.

I ain’t a Feminist,
Not an equal,
Nor do I have it All!

In this era now or any other, a woman is always going be a woman. A goddess somewhere a whore somewhere.
It doesn’t matter what they think of you. What matters is what you think of yourself.

You don’t need to stand up every time nor  will you be any less if you don’t raise your voice about being liberal. You can be ancient and still be a woman of your own choice. You don’t have to be  part of a fleet. You don’t have to be what they want you to be.

Does being feminist mean more power only to those who are practical and independent?
Smart in their language and will slap a man even if he just looks at you?
Someone who’d do a candle march and tell you, you are much more than just a vagina!

Does that change the world?

Ten thousand feminists vs ten million women, who will still be a female before being a feminist.
Those women who work three times of a man and yet be scapegoats. Being abused and bruised and yet not be enough of a feminist because they didn’t scream themselves to the world.
They chose themselves to be the ones with the soft hearts and cried themselves to bed. They wept all night dreaming of a miracle which never came by in all these years .

Does equal mean power only to those who’s men cook and clean? Equals only when we are opinionated and out spoken. Better half’s only when we share the tv remote or let you have what you want!

Does that change the world?

Twenty thousands of equals vs twenty billions of women who will still give their men the first spoon of their soup. Still be the last one to switch of the lights no matter how hard they both work.

A woman will never be an equal and it is foolish for them to say so. For they who do much more than their other half could ever do. For they who don’t need to hold the door yet they get banged with doors on their faces. And yet they still hang waiting for those who’d brag them over. How are they ever going to be equals when they will always be the ones who ripped of their vaginas to get you out!

Never have it All by any means. No matter how deep her values and her thoughts are. She will never have it all because she is not a he.

She will always double everything for him yet she will never have it All.

Does that change the world?

No woman can say she has it all because she doesn’t. She always has too much on her plate not because that is what she deserves but only because it’s only she who can manage it All.

And yet, she will always be the nagger. She will always be put down for the smallest of things. She will be everything and yet she won’t have it All. This is the nature of the universe, centuries before and centuries later it will always be the same. And yet she will try and try again to only know that she will never have it all because she
has so much more than just having it all.